Loud Chewers… Sir Chomps-a-lot

I work with a guy who recently discovered breakfast cereal. He sat in the open space work cubicle next to me and recently started snacking on cheerios and shredded wheat ALL DAY LONG! He took no breaks, from his snacking, that is. He would eat one at a fucking time. And he would systematically crunch down on eat one of those poor little frosted breakfast cereal pieces.

What did I do to piss him off? I really think he’s doing it to piss me off. Crunch crunch crunch, all fucking day long! I want to shove the whole fucking box of cereal into his mouth until he chokes on it!

I just don’t get it. I’ve even started calling him “Sir Chomps-a-lot” to no use.

After an entire month of this incessant crunching I have figured a work-around. I found an empty room in our building on another floor. I have moved my desk, my computer, my little nick knacks, fucking everything! I moved to a place where I won’t hear any more chomping other than my own.

And I even heard that Sir Chomps-a-lot is thinking about moving in with me, to get away from the distractions in the open office layout.

I said “Not on your life! Move at your own risk!!!!”

So far, so good!

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